I’ve never really been into the whole “gay marriage” thing. I’ve never really needed it, or felt like having it was something that really pertained much to me in my life. It never seemed important to my situations.

Maybe I was failing to see the bigger picture.

Maybe I’ve always had a hard time believing that something like that could ever happen to me, so why care if it can happen for someone else.

It’s funny how things change.  One day you wake up and you’re just a complete different person, with completely different ideas, and completely different goals.

Maybe I just never  had the right person in my life. One that makes you feel like you’re the most amazing person in the entire world.

Maybe I’ve never needed the thought of gay marriage, because I’ve never believed in someones’ ability to be gay and married. I’m not sure.

I believe that working in the bars for so long has been both the best and worst thing that could happen to me. The best part of it, is that you truly learn how to read people. You learn so much about people in general, and that knowledge is invaluable. Though, that’s also the worst part of it. You see people make mistakes. You see different sides of them. Sides you shouldn’t. Sides you wish you didnt. I’ve seen so many people that I thought were committed to their significant other, make decisions that show otherwise. And while it’s never anyones’ business….you find yourself frustrated with the situations in general. Eventually, you start to see just how much more difficult the gay community would be if marriage was allowed. You find yourself not wanting the label on your own relationship. Like it’s the mark of death or something.

Factor in the fact that I come from a broken home, raised predominately by my father, (with a shit ton of help from my grandparents) and you can see why I might not be a huge supporter of it.

However, the older I get the more I see the appeal.

I know what it feels like to love a person so much that you want to share everything with them. I know what it feels like to love a person so much that you want the world to be able to see that love. I know what it feels like to be afraid that the person that you love more than anything might not be able to see you in the hospital, or have the right to make decisions for you when you aren’t able to.

I know what it’s like to know that you want to spend the rest of your life with someone. And, I think having that has changed me.

I don’t think like the adolescent that I’ve been anymore. I find myself thinking like the adult I’ve become.

As I start knock-knock-knockin on 30’s door, (ill be 28 in like three weeks) I find myself more concerned with the future, and less with the current.

I’m not suggesting that I’m ready to get married or anything like that, but I am saying that my views have changed a bit. I understand that it’s not as much about being married, as much as it’s about being equal. I realize that the love that I hold inside for another person is real. It’s passionate. It’s amazing. And, for anyone to say that it’s not equal to a love that another person might have for a member of the opposite sex, is offensive.

My love is just as potent and unmeasurable as any other persons. And, I don’t see why anyone but me and the person I love have a say in how I choose to define that love, and how I choose to share that love with the world. It’s mine. It’s ours. It’s their own.

Awhile back this group surfaced and started this campaign against gay marriage. I’m not sure the actual link, but it was something called heterosexualsonly.com. (or somethin)

There were clips of hired actors speaking out, claiming that gay marriage destroyed the sanctity of marriage. People believing that two men, or two women sharing their lives with each other eliminates the validation of our parents’ or grandparents’ relationships exist in the world. And it boggles my mind. That people can feel so threatened by someone elses’ love.

I can’t believe that my love threatens those who love someone of the opposite sex, because their love doesn’t threaten me. It empowers me. It makes me feel joy. I smile at the thought of someone else in the world finding something as amazing as I’ve found. I would never want to keep that away from someone, but would hope to be able to share it with someone. I would hope to be able to help others in finding such feelings.

People think that a little girl who sees to men together, might not grow up waiting for her prince charming.  Somehow, they believe that two lesbians being married somehow corrupts the two senior citizens’ marriage of 45 years, the pastor and his wife with 5 kids’ marriage.

To these people I say that if your marriage, relationship, or love in general can be threatened, harmed, taunted, lessened, or damaged in any way, shape or form by the love that I share for another man…then your love isn’t real. It’s not raw, and genuine. It’s not unconditional, or valid at all.

Love changes you. And if you had it, you would never try to keep it from someone else. Ever.

It is hard to imagine a world without love. And, to know that some people would be so narrow minded to try to keep that away from someone makes me sad. It makes me sad because the people that feel this way, can’t possibly understand what the emotion is in the first place. And if they aren’t capable of understanding it, they probably aren’t capable of experiencing it. And, if you never experience it, you miss out on the whole purpose of being in this world.

Anyone can chug through life being themselves. You can live for you, and do things your way, and accomplish the greatest things. But, there’s an unexplainable satisfaction in being able to do the smallest of things with one other person, and knowing that there’s noone else in the entire world you’d rather do them with.

And, it hits you that you don’t have to reach these amazing levels of success. I can’t imagine myself anymore successful than I am right now. Whether I make more money, or reach my dreams of being a successful author, I’ll always have this moment.

The one where I had the most amazing person beside me. Whom I’d sacrifice anything and everything for.

And inside of that is where you find what love is.

It doesn’t really matter if their body parts are the same, infact that’s one of the few things that shouldn’t matter.

It’s too bad that some people will never be able to understand that.